I've finally got it figured out. I think! :)

I’d like to start by saying that I am honored that many great people are reading my blog and offering me encouraging feedback. It means more than I can say. I love you guys!

I’d like to go back to something I mentioned previously. I said I wouldn’t focus much on this, and I don’t plan to, but I realized it is important that I elaborate just a little on body image related to my ideal life. If it was possible to get paid to obsess about body image, well, I’d already be a millionaire, guaranteed! And this seems like an important topic to discuss because who is NOT concerned with their body image? I really don’t know. I admire those people if they are out there. I’m sure there are some, and they probably look great because they aren’t creating a flawed body by worrying about having a flawed body!

I have thought about this subject, and talked about it, and obsessed about it since I was 17 years old (all the while, having a body that many women would be elated to have.) I don’t know where this obsession stemmed from. My poor friends have listened to me for years drone on and on about my latest fixation – low-fat diet, Adkins diet, grapefruit diet, kickboxing, Tai-bo, Pilates, yoga, yada, yada, yada. And I was halfway aware that I was the skinny girl who probably annoyed people – but I was so obsessed with the topic that I couldn’t help but talk about it. If I stood outside of myself for a moment, I knew I was being ridiculous, but I didn’t know how to “change my mind”.

Once I realized I create my reality, and certainly my body, by my thoughts and beliefs, I thought this would be an easy thing to fix. I identified the thoughts that I didn’t want, like “I can’t eat that.” or “I HAVE to go to the gym.” etc. And I decided to have new thoughts that I liked better like, “I can eat whatever I want.” and “I won’t exercise unless it is something really fun and I really want to!” And I decided that was that, easy as pie!

See, I was just sure that my body would be perfect because I would hold the vision and MAKE myself believe that my body is perfect, no matter what! I thought I would tell myself that, if I want to, I can eat chocolate drizzled on everything. And even if I eat bacon with every meal I will still be healthy and look great! Oh, I was excited about this. A perfect body and all I had to do all along was change my beliefs about food and exercise and how those affect my body! Yippy!

Right?

Well, I do believe it IS that easy. I think it IS possible if I really, truly believed it. But, as it turns out, I didn’t really believe it! I mentioned before that I learned real quickly how difficult it can be for me to UNDO beliefs that aren’t working for me. And hopefully, this year that will be less of a problem for me. But let me tell ya, I wrestled with this set of beliefs ALL the time – and I lost!

But, I finally got it worked out! Tomorrow I’m going to tell you my secret! I imagine you’re on pins and needles. :) I don’t have a lot of stuff figured out in life – but maybe I’m onto something with this one!

I wanted to do a little reflection today since I have nearly been at this for a month. I haven’t been blogging for a month, but I have been in the “mindset” of creating what I want for a month. I gotta say, stopping the constant mindless chatter in my head (over, quite often, irrelevant, pointless nonsense) is proving to be a little challenging!! I catch myself several times throughout the day thinking, “Why, why am I thinking about this!? Somebody STOP me!!”

And, furthermore, I have recently been caught up in more drama than I can ever remember being caught in before! Now, I am a story teller. By that I mean, I can retell a story (which I always do) and so people think there is always something exciting happening to me. But in truth, my life seems to be pretty even keeled. I mean, I seem to always be in the same mood. I tend to be pretty happy all the time. On the low end of the scale, I am content. And all of the sudden, I am surrounded by people and situations and I feel like I am riding Disney’s Space Mountain (you know the crazy a*s rollercoaster in the DARK!)

I found it kind of fun, at first. I mean, this is living right? If it stings, you can feel it! And it isn’t as if it is permanent damage. It is more like bungee jumping (without the actual risk of dying if your cord is too long). I would just be in a conversation, and it was as if I had bungee jumped off a bridge! I would get a rush of adrenalin, I felt fear, and even wanted to scream. And in the next minute, I would shake it off and almost want to do it again!

I recognize I was attracting the drama and choosing to engage. And if you think about it, I imagine that is why we are HERE. If you operate under the assumption, as I do, that we are here to engage in the drama of this plane of matter, so that we can learn, evolve, and grow, well then, I say, LET’S DO IT! And I found it fun for a minute. But then I realized that this is actually how some people live most of the time! Really, they don’t unhook the bungee cord from their ankles. As near as I can tell, they just keep on jumpin’ all the time! Well, EEEEK! I need some stable ground and a cup of coffee!

Anyway, my words of wisdom for the day, “I doubt you can create your ideal situation when you are flying through the air screaming.” So, ride the drama train for a minute or two, ‘cause its fun. But then, GET OFF! :)

Today, I’d like to go talk a little more about this lottery goal of mine. If you know me, you may know I’ve been refining this goal for a while. I started buying lottery tickets as soon as I turned 18. I bought tickets almost every week when I was young. And I almost never checked my tickets. Yep, that’s right, I never even checked my tickets! Maybe if any unclaimed winning lottery tickets were sold in the early ‘90’s in Florida, I actually already won the lottery! Isn’t that funny? I guess I didn’t REALLY believe I would ever win! I don’t know why I even bought the tickets. Maybe I was addicted to the hope.

I always held on to the new American dream, “What if I won the lottery?” But when I started really studying about religion, spirituality, quantum physics, brain functions, hormones, etc.; when I started to really consider that perhaps I design my life through thoughts; I started taking the idea of winning the lottery more seriously. I actually realized when I sat down and thought about it, that I really believed the odds were too astronomical and there was no way I could win the lottery.

But I started to try to convince myself that I could create this if I really wanted to. And then I had to decide if I really wanted to! Have you ever really sat and put much thought toward that? It is amazing that you’ll discover a few buried fears about this. Well, at least I did. I mean, I didn’t really want my entire life to change, but certainly tons of money changes your life considerably. And do I want that change? What if people only like me for my money? What if people write me letters and tell me their sad stories so I will give them my money? How much will my family expect? How much will my friends expect? What if I die of guilt when I pass a homeless person? I grappled with all of these thoughts and wondered if I really wanted the lottery after all!

And after a great deal of time, I decided that the pros of winning outweighed the cons, so I moved forward with my vision of me holding a winning ticket! Of course, I didn’t REALLY believe it for a very long time. I have mentioned how hard it is to undo limiting beliefs for me. And I realized that I have identified with being poor my entire life. How do you go from seeing yourself as poor to seeing yourself as rich? For me, it takes a lot of time! It takes some soul searching and paying attention to what I say and what I think about, and I am still fairly bad at it. Hence the reason why I haven’t won yet, I suppose! But I’ve never given up trying to convince myself I can win the lottery.

I’ve made baby-step progress. I went from completely disbelieving I could win the lottery, to just doubting. Then I moved from doubting to hoping. Then hope turned into actual consideration. And that consideration turned into glimpses of knowing. And that is a strong confession. That is a brave statement, I think. Because as quickly as I KNOW that I can manifest a winning lottery ticket, I retract back into that shell of doubt, which extinguishes my knowing. Maybe I fall back into that social consciousness that just doesn’t believe this is possible, or maybe I just fall back into my own lack of faith. But I STILL have moments of clarity and knowing. And THAT is where I would like to hold my attention this year.

Now, I should say (and this isn’t a cop out if I just happen to fail at producing) that I don’t actually believe that my PATH to happiness HAS to be winning the lottery. As I stated previously, the lottery is a means to an end. My ‘end’ is to inspire people, to remind people of their power, and to live by example. And I know I can consider myself a success without winning the lottery. However, think of the Wow Factor! it would produce if I believed with every fiber of my being that I could win the lottery simply by knowing it, and I did it! That would be SO incredible! Imagine the ramifications! Imagine what people would produce, if they knew they only have to dream it long enough for it to travel through this plane of space and time we’ve submerged ourselves in! Then their dream is reality! How exciting, right?

I really believe this. It rings true to me all the way down to my tiniest cells. I draw up this game plan! I decide the players, the field, the rules, the time, if I win or lose!! I decide it all because this is MY game! All I have to do is dream it until I KNOW it! What a miracle!

And who doesn’t love miracles?

PS. What’s your game plan?

More Goals

So, continuing on with what I plan to accomplish this year which would qualify as my producing my ideal life... I should say that I already have created so much of this. For example, I have the happiest child who taught me about love, the most supportive mother, the best friends, rewarding work, a comfortable home, good health, etc. And I feel like I had to really visualize most of these things in order to materialize them.

For example, I go through periods of my life (okay, nearly 80% of my life) where I am obsessing about food and exercise. I have struggled with this my entire life, which is completely ridiculous because I’m actually very genetically gifted and I’m always fairly physically fit, if not very fit. It is such an odd problem that I’ve struggled with since I can remember, and it has taught me a great deal about how challenging it can be to change “sponsoring thoughts” Undoing beliefs that aren’t producing what I want CAN be difficult for me, but I think that is because I have doubts in my abilities as a creator. It is my goal that once I dig down and find the belief or expectation that is producing some undesired results in my life, that I KNOW it is easy to alter that thought in my head, and a new/better belief is nearly instantaneous. How about THAT for heaven on earth? But currently, I’m not having any issues in the area of my health or body image, so I won’t focus on this much. My point being, I think I’ve done the work mentally to create this part of my ideal life already.

And another noteworthy example, I very consciously held a vision of working well with my ex-husband, even during times that it seemed completely impossible. I can remember lying on the floor crying, wishing I could just sleep for a year or so until I woke up and everything was better. And with my face on the ground, I would picture him and me in a conversation, smiling, even laughing. This was such a far fetched idea, but I forced myself to have it. And that is exactly what I have. I am nearly moved to tears sometimes – tears of joy – because I couldn’t ask for an easier situation than what I have now. And it has been this easy for years. Of course, he gets half the credit for it being so easy. I am just saying that some areas of my life are so obvious for me to see how I’ve already created what I want. And I don’t have to do any more work in these areas.

By the way, do this if you’ve never taken the time. Sit down and consider how you got where you are. Try to follow the thoughts, beliefs, and expectations that got you what you have today. I highly recommend this. This is the first step in helping you understand that you have complete control over your life, which leads to the exciting realization that since you’ve created your current situation, you can create any situation you want!

And I won’t go into this much right now, but understand that if you find serious hurdles in your life, like loss, death, illness, tragedy, etc. I believe these challenges provide us with maybe the only REAL opportunity to figure out what kind of people we really are. The largest hurdles provide us with the chance to see how high we can really jump. “That which doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger.” So consider that you may have created (and the Universe provided) opportunities for you to prove your own strength to yourself. And this often comes in the form of a sh*t storm! So please don’t be discouraged by the challenges you find yourself facing, and don't let go of the idea that you can create countless wonderful situations in your life if you choose!

So back to what I want for this year. I mentioned the lottery thing and that would be great. But suppose the Universe wants me to gain my financial freedom in some other way; I’d like to get on with that this year! I’m not asking to be able to purchase an island here. I am college educated, I teach at-risk students for a non-profit organization, and I’m pretty sure I qualify for food stamps! I know I don’t have any insurance or benefits. I’ve done some serious reflection in this area with regard to WHY I’ve created a situation where I struggle to make ends meet on a monthly basis. My current work is, by far, the most rewarding work I’ve ever done. I think my own personal identification with being poor is so ingrained deep within me that I struggle to release that. Or maybe I feel like a better person because I help people and don’t do it for the money. Whatever this ‘sponsoring thought’ is, I’d like to remove it from my mind and replace it with one that serves me better! I’m ready to be compensated for my work and energy, so I’d like to work on that this year.

I want to fill my life with more like-minded people. I have great friends now. But people are the most important aspect of life, in my opinion, so I could always use more. And by like-minded, I guess I mean people who don’t judge and who allow me to be whatever I choose to be. I’d like to surround myself with people who reflect goodness back to me, who see good in me. I think I offer this, so it is fair that I ask for it in return! :)

I want an ideal partner for me. I’m an idealist. I’m not sure if that is good or bad. I don’t expect to find a “perfect” situation, but I’d like to find someone who fits with me. I’m not listing a bunch of attributes here because I didn’t plan this to be a dating service! I’d just like to let go of people who aren’t great for me as soon as I know it and open myself to find someone who is great for me. This is high on my priority list. (You may get a good kick out of watching me bumble and stumble through attempting to reach this goal this year! It is often funny, ugly, exciting and somewhat scary, but I always learn something valuable! Besides, this year I plan to get it right!)

I want to convince myself I am getting younger, and hopefully my appearance and attitude will reflect this. Yeah, THIS is going to be interesting. But just imagine how remarkable if I succeed!!

I want clear, accurate communication from Spirit. I say Spirit meaning my Higher Self, spirit guides, angels, God, nature…anything like that. I already have some incredible communication that I may share at some point when I am feeling brave, but I am not 100% sure it is accurate! I don’t have the faith I need in myself or the process or whatever, so even though I get positive, encouraging, helpful messages that guide me in the right direction, I also have a bag full of doubts to go with that. I’d like to release those doubts and trust this guidance.

I guess that’s it. It didn’t take long to put down in words, but I’ve put a great deal on my plate! Lottery, get younger, find my ideal partner, and communicate with something or someone (or many) who have a broader perspective and who can help me (and maybe you too, if I’m brave enough to share) create a happy life! Yeah, WOW!

I can do this!! I can do this! I can do this! (It helps to picture the Little Engine That Could here!)

(PS. I pull some pics from the visionboard at Tut.com -- I love those guys! You should check it out and sign up for them Messages from the Universe -- brilliant stuff!)

Goal Number One

So, I was starting today with listing my goals for the year. I wonder if this is easy for some people. I keep thinking, “I know this process really works – visualizing from within – but I might just be really horrible at it, and what if I fail miserably in the public eye?” How’s that for a dose of positive attitude!

I’m goin’ in! I’m doin’ this! I feel like I’m at the top of a waterfall and it is time to jump! Cowabunga Dude! (Did I just quote a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?)

Goal #1
I want to create a lot of money, ideally, by winning the lottery.
Now before you say, “No sh*t!” I want to clarify myself on this point. Sure, I’d like the freedom, options, and opportunities that come with a lot of money. But I have different fueling factors behind wanting to win the lottery. I chose this method of attaining lots of money by the sheer recognition I would get. Let me explain. What does NEARLY EVERYONE say? “If I won the lottery, I would…” Almost everyone dreams of this, fantasizes about this, considers this. Now, just what if – what if I set my mind, my meditations, my visions to winning the lottery and I do it. Sure, there will be a handful of people who will call that coincidence, but maybe many other people will consider that I really made it happen! Even if I only inspired one person to dream bigger, reach higher, try for more --- I would feel successful! I just envision me on the cover of my book How I Won the Lottery (or something catchier than that with the same meaning!). How many people do you think might crack that book open? And ultimately, they may become empowered. They may remember their natural-given abilities to create. They may TRY and succeed. THIS is my dream! THIS fuels me more than anything, ever. I envision a world where everyone dreams of their ideal life and actually does the “mental” work to get it done.

And actually, no one really needs to win the lottery if they knew they could just set their mind on the thing they plan on getting with the lottery. And imagine the competition you’d have once my book went on the national bestseller list!! You’d have to be the best focuser over everyone playing the lottery – and what are the odds?? :) But let’s say you just focus on what you want to gain from winning the lottery. No one wants just the paper with the matching numbers, they want the something they think they can have after that! So what is that? And focus on that! You want to win the lottery so you can see all the World Wonders? So just picture you at those places. Or you want the lottery so you can buy your dream home and dream car? – so just picture yourself with those.

And actually, I think if you play it out in your mind, as I have countless times, and you think about what happens after you have your winning lottery ticket. I think you’ll find after you buy some things and see some places, you’ll eventually get back to trying to figure out what you can do with yourself that you LOVE. Maybe you want to start a magazine or open a bridal shop or open a bakery, because you LOVE doing that thing. It excites you. It doesn’t feel like work! You are ultimately going to come back to figuring out what you want to do with yourself that is fulfilling and gratifying for you. Sure, I guess there would be those people that just spend crazy amounts of money on anything and don’t really consider spending their money on a grander personal purpose – and we’ve seen those people on TV, Won the Lottery; Now Bankrupt! (Please forgive me if this happened to you and it wasn’t your circumstance.) But ultimately, the lottery really boils down to choices and freedom. And what if we knew we had that without winning the lottery. What if we understood that this was our God-given ability – to create anything and everything we can possibly imagine and hold our thoughts on? I hope I prove this to you. Because, you see, I feel that my grander purpose is to teach and to inspire. And hopefully, if you know me, you already know this!

And even though I shared with you that I want to win the lottery. I understand that I will have achieved my goal if I have freedom, options, and opportunities at the end of this year, because those things come in other forms than just a little ticket with numbers matching the numbers of the balls. But more importantly, I will have won the lottery if someone out there follows me through this year, sees how I created a life I love, and gains a little better understanding that we all decide, we all create, we all get to choose our own ideal reality – and if we believe, expect and keep an eye on the prize, we get it!

Tomorrow, more goals! Yep, I have more!

What do YOU want??

Creating My Ideal Life or My Own Heaven on Earth

When I was first introduced to the idea that my thoughts become my life, or for short, Thoughts Become Things (thank you for Mike Dooley’s catchy phrase, short and to the point!), I wondered what sort of life would I like to have – so I could get started thinking about it! But once I was over denying I would produce some of the crap that was, in fact, a part of my reality; and once I could sort of see how my current thoughts led me to my current situation, THEN I was excited at the prospect of creating something GREAT!

But what??

Before we talk about MY ideal life, I would like you to consider for a minute that I may be right – and all the people studying quantum physics, countless spiritual teachers since recorded history, and many, many others may be onto something! Our lives are exact creations of our thoughts, expectations, beliefs, fantasies, fears – anything we focus on and feel strongly about. (And unfortunately, it works both ways; you get what you think about whether you think about what you want or if you think about what you don’t want.) So once you roll this idea around in your head for a little bit, what do you want to focus on? What do you want to think about, and get excited about, until it’s sitting right in front of you? Maybe you should try this with me!

I’m sure some people have absolutely no idea what their ideal life looks like! I’d say many people haven’t even considered it. This may be because they don’t think a perfect life is a real option, or they can’t see the “hows”, so they don’t bother with the imagining. Some people may not feel like they deserve it or they are worthy of it. Some people simply can’t make up their mind for long enough to actually produce something! I’m sure there are countless reasons why people haven’t thought about what their “Heaven on Earth” looks like.

Yeah, maybe you should go on this journey with me! You produce your ideal life and I’ll produce mine, and we’ll be the “evidence” that others need so that they’ll try it for themselves!

My goal was originally to share my journey with you – as I produce what I want or as I produce what I don’t want (if I think about what I don’t want more than I think about on what I want!!). My goal was to document here what I create, good, bad, ugly, or spectacular! I wanted this form of communication to be my fuel to keep my thoughts focused on what I want and not the other mindless chatter that fills most of my waking hours. But, I realize that this very medium can serve my larger purpose, which is to remind people that they have control of their lives. My overall life goal is to empower people through example that they can live remarkable lives, even though starting this blog was just to give me some motivation to tackle the smaller goal of focusing! So maybe I’ll kill two goals with one blog! :)

Ummm, anyway, I guess I’m going to have to share what my Heaven on Earth looks like, so you can know if I create it or not. Eeeek, this is a little scary! Once I say it, I’m gonna need some proof for my pudding, so to speak!! My biggest fear is that I will sound all gung ho and focused during the blog, but all the other hours of the day I won’t be focused on what I want at all. Then I’ll have to be honest when at the end of this year, I either have nothing I said I wanted, or even worse, I have the opposite of that! That is my worst fear! Like for example, I could say I want a new car and end up trading my old one for a bike! I don’t really want a new car, I’m just sayin’!! Once I put the goals out there – I feel like I can’t just skate by anymore. My life is fine. It’s actually mostly good. But I want it to be EXCEPTIONAL! Don’t we all? Sometimes we set it so far on the back burner that we can’t even remember when we had dreams of being spectacular, but I think it is all down there inside of all of us. And, although I am getting’ younger :) , I might as well get on with being something great!

So, tomorrow, confessing goals! You think of yours tonight too! We have focusing to do!

Day One

Hello! My name is Miachel (it is pronounced My Shel). Welcome to my blog! It just recently occurred to me that I should start my own blog. I am actually fairly technologically ignorant and I feel guilty if I spend too much time on the computer, so blogging hadn’t crossed my mind in the past. However, I rented Julie and Julia, the movie about the woman who blogs her way through making all the recipes in Julia Child’s cookbook – and lo’ and behold! I was inspired! I haven’t done any research or prep work for blogging, I’m just going in, head first. So if you are a well-wisher, you might wish me luck! Hopefully, blogging is a fairly simple process and all I have to do is come up with interesting posts!

I actually have a planned (and I use the term loosely) topic! I have been toying around with some ideas for years. I say toying, but I guess I take them quite seriously – I just get “caught up” in life too often and these ideas take the back burner. So, I figured that a blog would sort of entice me to move forward. I mean, even if I have just one reader, I hope I feel a sort of obligation to do what I said I would do – and this will keep my ‘motivation ball’ rolling! So, yes, this is an attempt to keep me focused and on track! As well as, perhaps unexpected surprises will come about also, like I meet some like-minded friends or someone offers up a healthy debate to keep me on my toes! It feels like a good idea, so I’m rolling with it!

So here are the nuts and bolts of my “plan” for the year 2010. I’m going to sort of combine a few ideas into one jumbled up creative project/stew! This year I want to focus on, 1) creating my own personal ideal life (or “Heaven on Earth”), 2) tapping into the wisdom of my Spiritual guidance that lies within me, and 3) debunking the myths of aging. If you are thinking this is a lot to tackle in one year – well, I agree! But I’m ready! I didn’t just start this today, I have spent years researching, reading, studying, contemplating, meditating on, journaling about…you get the idea. I have laid the groundwork, so to speak. And I can tell you, that you can read all you want, but if you never make any internal changes, the years just pass and nothing much changes externally either. So I’m ready!

Whereas I am thrilled to be motivated by the idea of readers interested in my progress, I have some teeny reservations about blogging. Blogging is actually like giving a piece of yourself away without knowing who you are giving it to, or if they will be gentle with you! I wish I could say that I’m as solid as a rock and I cannot be discouraged by doubters as I wade through the waters of my personal adventure of life, and maybe I can’t. Hopefully, I can’t! I just want to explore, learn, grow, figure something out for myself, and mostly, hopefully, inspire someone out there to do the same too. I know not everyone will agree with me. Believe me, I know. And I’m perfectly fine with that. I guess I have some tiny fears, but ultimately I’m just excited at the idea of doing something great this year and sharing that with you.

I may challenge your way of thinking. But if it isn’t entirely offensive to you, stick with me for a bit. You see, to some people my ideas are as natural as roasting marshmallows while camping or buying popcorn at the movies; and to others, my ideas are as foreign as people being born with four sets of eyes or cats walking backwards. And honestly, most people probably fall somewhere in the middle of believing and disbelieving what I plan to present here. Hell, I’m just trying to figure most of this out, so I can relate to anyone’s stance on my ideas. I would just like to say that I can only follow what feels real inside of me. For as long as I could remember, my mother told me that I create my reality. I didn’t really get that when I was young. And when I was in my twenties and early thirties, I didn’t really believe it. Then, one day it made sense to me. I found many books that supported this theory. It is certainly becoming a mainstream idea since such movies as The Secret or What the Bleep is Down the Rabbit Hole. I will certainly mention my most valued authors and teachers here, at some point, and they operate under the assumption (some even say ‘law’) that we are our own personal creators of the very life we lead. All of it. Not parts of it, or moments of it, or shades of it -- all of it! I like the analogy that I read recently that our lives are created within us, and then that creation is projected outward so that our inner world may be interpreted by our senses. And what we see in our exterior world is a perfect replication of what is within us. This is uncomfortable for some people to hear because they see a lot of crap in their lives and they don’t wish to think that they created such things. And I will address this more at a later time, but think of the beauty and empowerment you feel when you realize that NOW THAT YOU KNOW – you can create anything you want!

I’m hoping to prove to myself, and to you, if you so choose to embark on this journey with me, that these aren’t myths. These are truths. And we can be happier and healthier and live longer when we realize that WE decide what our life is – what our reality is! I am going to try hard to maintain focus on creating my own personal heaven on earth, altering my own personal signs of aging, and utilizing my spiritual guidance from within this year. This is my year. This is our year. If I can prove to myself, and consequently prove to even one other person who’s reading, that we can be or do or have anything in the world that we so choose, then this documentation will be worth it!